Monday, May 9, 2011
CAPTCHA is my New Best Friend
I am seriously thinking about abandoning all other forms of naming places, being it making up stuff to grabbing words from old dead languages, and replacing them with CAPTCHA words. Specifically the ones that Blogger uses. I mean, these things are awesome. I don't know what weird ass algorithm they are using. Maybe they are just chopping up the dictionary and randomly pasting it back together. I've been collecting the CAPTCHA words on each comment I make. Here are the last few:
Are they not awesome? My mind buzzes with their potential meanings:
Imperith - It brings to mind Imperial and Impair, with a good splash of Regolith mixed in. What is it? Is it a certain type of soil that kills nobles? Or is the town founded by the rebels fighting against the empire, with massive stone walls protecting it? The town of Imperith would be situated in a mountain pass where it would be easy to throw rocks down on the red cloaked Imperial Guard and their lackeys.
Misingst - At first glance, it reminds me of Missing Misogynists. But also Mist. Mist reminds me of bogs. Perhaps this is a bog, where in ancient times, rapists were tied up, loaded down with rocks, and drowned for their crimes. But their evil overwhelmed the bog, and now the leathery skinned, undead rapist bogmen stalk the Misingst Swamp at might, searching for more victims.
Incess - More perversions coming . . . this reminds me of Inverness and Incest, all rolled into one. A ancient dark tower looms over a well hidden vale in the mountains. A sorcerer built the tower long ago, and refused to let any of the inhabitants of the vale leave. The wizard became a lich, and over the years the vale's population interbred. Now the tower is silent, tended to by the deformed and sadistic offspring of the farmers and townsfolk of Incess Vale, waiting for the time their master will rise from his crypt and wage war upon the outsiders.
Reststro - Wow - this one has Rest, Restroom, Restaurant, and Bistro all rolled into one. Everyone, I mean everyone, wants to go to the little town of Reststro. It's a little town up on the side of a mostly dormant volcano. A constant supply of hot water gives the town a constant supply of hot water - allowing for the largest collection of public and private bath houses in the region. With relaxation and money comes prostitution, gambling, graft, organized crime, corruption, and all that other fun stuff.
Empffeci - My mind goes to Imps and Imperfecto. The 'ffeci' part on the end seems Italian-esque, but it doesn't ring any bells, so we'll just make this place a sea-port on a warm inland sea. A desperate merchant struck up a deal with some Infernal Entities, selling his soul to create a he could be lord of. A host of imps descended upon the shore and began building toward the sea. The Port of Empffeci is mostly built on stilts, it's streets go this way and that, and part of the architecture is under the water. Drawn on a map, Empffeci looks like a plate of spaghetti someone threw on the sidewalk.
Ninsh - Hmm . . . Nine, Ninny, Inch. Once upon a time, there were nine sisters who were a bit stupid. Their evil step-mother told them to go to town and fetch a ham for dinner. They came back, telling her that the bridge over the nearby gorge was out. The evil step-mother told them that the gorge was just nine inches wide, so they could easily jump over it. The sisters tried, and all fell down into the gorge and drown in the river below. In celebration, the evil step-mother named place the Ninsh Gorge.
Aritial - What comes to mind? Aries. Arteries. Insubstantial. So we have a ram, blood, and see-thruness. AHA! Many years ago, a disgruntled farmer, tired of his woes and fed up with his deaf god, decided to turn to the DARK ONES to help his family and crops. He took his prized ram up to the top of a hill and, during a horrible thunderstorm, sacrificed the beast with a obsidian sickle. But instead of good fortune, his house burned down and his crops died. From then on, travelers have been wary of Aritial Hill. Some say there they see the angry ghost of the sacrificed ram, it's fleece glowing like fire and acidic blood spewing from it's horns.
Okay, maybe they won't replace all the other ways of generating names, but they are fun to brainstorm with.