Sunday, July 17, 2011

Erotic Fantasy

During our game tonight, one of my players piped up that he had recently come into a batch of old D&D books that he really wasn't interested in, and asked if we wanted any.  He mention that one was an erotic D&D book - and I said "Sure, I'll take a look at it, at least."

He said that if his girlfriend saw it, she would probably freak big time.  What he brought back from the car was a rather beat up copy The Book of Erotic Fantasy.  "Oh, that thing," I laughed.  "Sure, I'll take it."

Having done a brief perusal through the book tonight, and I'm just amazed at the controversy.  It's been a while, but I seem to remember some people were quite upset about this book.

It's got some boobs in it, there are dildos too.  And there is a brothel.  And it talks about sex and BDSM and magical ruffies and pregnancy times for elves.  Perhaps I am too jaded - but so what?

There was a lot of sex in our D&D games when I was a teenager.  We weren't hot chatting across the table or anything, but everyone needed to know the charisma of the tavern wench, the big bad vampire lady had to be wearing a leather bustier, and all of the princesses wore magical chastity belts with 'automatic blade de-incentives' for protection.  Some characters would get married to NPCs and have lots of children. The hormones raging in our pimply bodies ensured that something regarding sex was uttered at least once in ever five minute time span.

I'm not exactly sure what the problem was when The Book of Erotic Fantasy was released.  Was it the kid issues - and the assumption that only kids played D&D?  Well, I think you fix that by just not selling it to kids.  Other titles get sold to only adults, right?  I know that at 14, I sure as heck couldn't go into the 7-11 and by a Playboy.  There is some kind of system, right?  I had to find my porn out in the woods behind a dumpster like all the other kids.  I never could figure why people were THROWING AWAY PORN, but hey, their loss.

Well, anyway, this book seems to have a lot of neat things to spice up an adult RPG game - even if you go nowhere near any brownchickenbrowncow moments.  I mean, what campaign couldn't be improved with a Crop of the Mistress or the Gnomish Kama Sutra?  Okay, yeah, I'm far from vanilla. :)

I told the Boy he could see it when he was 18.  He was okay with that.  Girls have cooties, doncha yanno?

- Ark


  1. I, uh, know some of the models personally. And some of the people who made it.

    I always thought that the ruckus over it was overblown, but I'm not stuck in the idea that gaming is a child's endeavor.

  2. I too had to find my porn out in the woods.

    Hard to believe those were the "good ol' days", but there you go...

    Purely out of academic curiousity, what are the pregnancy times for elves?

  3. yeah, there's hardly anything you would consider controversial in there. I had the original netbook version. Personally, I thought most of it was actually useful. I've had STD's, the bitch table and, yes, the effects of spellcasting during pregnancy come up at various points in my games. So to me, it's still a very useful resource.

  4. The issues at the time was not so much the content but the fact that it was using the d20 licenses and logo. It also took the required line of needing the D&D player's handbook and increased the font of the words "Dungeons and Dragons" above and beyond all the others.

    While it never broke any of the rules of the OGL, it did bend them a bit. The fact that is was a book of "erotic" content only brought more attention to it.

  5. Found my porn in a river. Strange that finding porn would be so common.

    And there was sex in our D&D games. Didn't seem to bother us, or mess us up either.

  6. I should have picked that up years ago when I had the chance. Gnome Kama Sutra...who knew?

  7. I had to find my porn out in the woods behind a dumpster like all the other kids. I never could figure why people were THROWING AWAY PORN, but hey, their loss.

    Hilarious line--mostly because it rang so true. Who throws away good porn, indeed? But it was our gain all the same, a real-life treasure to brag about at that point in our lives.

    It's funny that sex almost never makes an appearance in our games. Occasionally there is mention of finding a lady of the evening, but it's never really at all a part of the in-town roleplaying.

    Which is funny given that all of us are in our late 30s to mid 40s--and fairly irreverent. To a person there are no prudes, yet something just seems out of bounds.

    (Love and romance appear not all I add.)

  8. @faoladh - How cool! Well, if you are still in contact, tell them that they have another fan. :)

    @biopunk - Wood porn! I guess it grows on trees or something. Oh, and the gestation persion for an elf is two years - a bit longer that an elephants. Just don't compare the elf lady with an elephant.

    @Dangerous Brian - Bitch table? I don't appear to be able to find that one.

    @Tim Brannan - Ah, interesting about the licensing. I don't see the words 'Dungeons and Dragons' anywhere on the front or back covers or inside that I can see. Perhaps I have a later printing.

    @Tedankhamen - Porn in a river??? Like, sealed in ziplock or something?

    @christian - The Gnome Kama Sutra and the Codpiece of Comeliness. Act now and we'll throw in a Phial of Avrel's Lubrication - in this handsome and reusable container in fashion colors.

    @ckutalik - It's interesting how people react to sexual things in a campaign. In one campaign, I had a character who was not interested in mentioning sex or even characters being attracted to one another at all. In the same game, a player had a character who's whole back story and purpose in life was to 'reunite' with a girl who hated him and tried to kill him - unbeknownst to the character (but no the player.)

    - Ark