Showing posts with label Artsy-Fartsy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Artsy-Fartsy. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Red Sonja Preview

I'm working on a drawing of Red Sonja.  I just finished inking her face and am pretty happy with it - so I thought I'd share before I go hit the sack.  Have a good night.

- Ark

Monday, March 5, 2012

Jeff Dee's Expedition

As you may or may not know, Jeff Dee has been running around trying to recreate the art he created that someone at TSR chose to toss in the trash one confused day.  This time, he's recreating his stuff form the module S3: Expedition to the Barrier Peaks.  I'm excited.  I love that module - and the fabulous art inside was really inspiring - well - inspiring to DMs who wanted to really confuse, mess over, and blow up the player characters.  Like I said, inspiring.

He's got a Kickstarter project for the Peaks too.  I love those Kickstarter things - especially those that help artists get projects off the ground.  Go toss him some bucks and he'll even send you a print! :)

- Ark

Friday, February 17, 2012

You Can Get Addicted To A Certain Kind of Sadness


No, not game related, but after listing to Gotye like a million times today, I had to do something. :)

- Ark

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Outsourced Game Report and Sketchdump

The Boy ran his Labyrinth Lord game last week.  It was a good old fashioned Holmesian-B/X style dungeon.  The party was made up entirely of gnomes.  Okay - Kaye played a half gnome/half orc.  I'm not sure what gnomish zeitgeist was in the air - but it worked.

The game started normally in a tavern, and turned strangely Salvador Dali-esque as my son's brain spewed forth with the imagination that only an 11 year old can wield.  He far exceeded my meager attempts at being a DM when I was the same age.  I had a lot of fun.

Crazy-Ass Tim has a wonderful report on our shared lucid dreaming session, which I suggest you check out.  I don't think I could have described it any better.

Meanwhile - please enjoy the sketchdump below:






- Ark

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Betty

Okay, so not game related, but I finally had the nerve to try and draw Betty Page.  Maybe Betty could attack a pack of PCs from atop a dragon.  Yeah.  That's the ticket.  But for right now, she's just chillin.

Betty has been bikini-ed for your protection.  For those of you who are feeling brave and NSFW, hop on over to my deviantArt gallery for the un-bikini-ing. :)

- Ark

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Pony Roller


And those of you who think I can leave well enough alone should know better.  Ponies are Magic.

So this is Twilight Sparkle rolling up her character the old fashioned way - 3d6 in order.  Looks like she's off to a bad start.

This is for Erin Palette and her awesomely awesome Unknown Ponies: Failure is Awesome.  Which I missed.  Completely.  Dammit.  I only check Facebook like every other week.

- Ark

Lady Roller

By popular demand - for those identifying as female. :)

- Ark

Old School Roller


Here is a little scribble I did.  It's yours.  Feel free to put it on your t-shirts, coffee mug, your blog, or shave your head and have it as a nifty new tattoo.  But don't sell it.  I think some people claim they own the shirt or something silly like that. :)

Higher res available on request.

- Ark

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Who Do Dwarves Hate?



Members of the 'Sexy Elves for Axeless Dwarves' Charity Cheerleaders Squad, that's who.

Really, it was just an excuse to practice drawing a picture of an axe pulled tight across boobies.  Why?  Ummmmm . . . no idea.  Oh yeah - fun!  Yeah, that's it.  It was fun! :)

- Ark

Friday, December 30, 2011

New Moleskine

Check out the new Moleskine I got for Christmas.  I'm not sure whether to use it or frame it.


And yes, I've been dorking with the blogs template.  Things are changing.  It's not just your imagination. ;)

- Ark

Monday, December 12, 2011

Naked Ponies!

Okay, not naked, but here is the original My Little Portal Ponies image without all that text.  I figure that other people can probably make it funnier than me.  Feel free to make word balloons, insert bad jokes, and spread bronie RPG love world-wide on your blogs and other places.  Penicillin optional.  Link-backs welcome.

- Ark

Clicking makes it bigger.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

My Little Pellatarrum

A few weeks ago, I made a smart-ass comment to Erin Palette, that went something like this. "For my next trick, I will draw the My Little Pony invasion of Pellatarrum." Pellatarrum being, of course, her crazy-ass fantasy setting, and My Little Pony being - well, if you don't know - stop reading. This isn't for you.

I had no idea how hard drawing fan art is.  Well, I could have spit out pony stick figures, but no - if I was actually going to act on my half-baked remark, I should do it right.  Trying it really makes you respect professional cartoon artists.  The forms are so simplistic - but have to be so perfect - otherwise they don't look right.  There is something very zen about the art form.  Yes, and this is complete drawn from scratch - no tracing - and done in SHARPIE on paper, then sucked into Photoshop for a dye-job.

The Boy was horrified and refused to look at what I was drawing while I hummed the My Little Pony theme song.  Okay, that was just a side benefit for my inner sadist.  

Below is the MLP Invasion of Pellatarrum.  I do not give this to the OSR, like previous art.  I give it to Bronies worldwide.  Post it wherever.  Not that I own anything about it.  Hasbro owns it all.  Just like D&D.  You know the drill.

So anyway, enjoy!

- Ark

Click Rainbow Dash to embiggen.




Wednesday, November 30, 2011

In the OSR . . .

Without further ado . . .


Yay.  I can draw cartoon boobies.

I had meant to write about five gazillion blog posts over the Thanksgiving holiday.  Instead, I wrote butkis.  Nada, zilch . . . nothing.  Not even a Dungeonspiration posts.  I suppose I could could apologize - but I really dislike when people apologize for not writing enough in their blog.  It's like they did something wrong.  Advocating genocide in your blog?  Okay, that's wrong.  Not posting enough?  NOT WRONG.  Lazy maybe, but not wrong. :)

So I've been drawing a lot, fiddling with different styles and whatnot.  The elf chick popped out when I was actually trying to draw something else - but I decided to color and ink it anyway - since I liked her expression.  But just the picture was kind of weird, so I gave it a caption.

POOF - it's a MEME!

Yay!  It's the "In the OSR . . ." meme!  Everyone jump on the bandwagon and go create something - a poem or macaroni art or whatnot.  Try to be actually funny - unlike me.

Like so much of my OSR art, I'm giving this to the community.  I doubt that anyone really wants it - but feel free to repost, spindle, and mutilate.

Ohhh - btw - I won an award!  Thanks Tim! (Not Crazy-Ass Tim, but the Other Tim.) Apparently, my blog is 'quirky.'  I had no idea.  I'm going to have to go look that up in the dictionary to find out what it means.

- Ark

Saturday, November 19, 2011

More Retro



Yeah - more stuff that doesn't have to do with gaming, but I was particularly happy with this one.  I'll try to keep more game related art on the blog.  After all, I have a deviantArt account to toss all the other stuff on. :)

Enjoy.

- Ark

Friday, November 18, 2011

Rather Gamey Cheesecake


Okay, so it has nothing to do with gaming.  More practice drawing.  This is an attempt to draw in a 'retro cartoon' style.  The reference, she is here.

This was done by hand with Sharpie and colored pencils, because the only pc that can run Photoshop was being used at the time by The Boy for SKYRIM.  Sheesh. ;)

Enjoy.

- Ark

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Chartreuse

PureStrainHuman (aka Crazy-Ass Tim) kicked off an AD&D 2e campaign this Monday, and we had a lot of fun.  I decided to dust off my Beard and Boob Badge and play a lady this time around.  Well, she's not a lady - she's a task oriented elven ranger named Chartreuse.  I really hoped that name didn't stray into the realm of 'stripper names.'  It's one of my favorite colors - and it's sort of green - and she's an elf - and - well - it made sense at the time.

Anyway, I'll give a play report soon.  This is the first real AD&D 2e game I've ever played, so I have LOTS to say about it.  ;)  Meanwhile, I decided to try to draw Chartreuse, and the result is below.  It's a very rough sketch, but I must say, the daily practice is paying off.  I can tell that it's a biped and that it's a she - so I must be on the right track.

I drew this!  Woot!  Click to embiggen - but beware - she might slap you.

Yeah - and she's got anime elf ears.  If Deedlit ears are good enough for Daffy Duck, they are good enough for me.  I hope to clean it up and ink it and all of that jazz at some point.  I might even try to draw a tree or two for some ambiance. :)

Enjoy.



- Ark

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Oktoberbrawl

Apparently, a couple of weeks of regular gesture drawing is pretty effective.  This sketch actually looks like a human being - at least to me, anyway.


So watch out.  If you spill your beer, Oktoberbrawl Girl will kick your ass with a stick.

- Ark

Friday, October 21, 2011

Draw the Ninja. Be the Ninja.

At some point, it was suggested that I illustrate my little 'what happened at the table' stories for the blog.  The prospect actually frightened me.  I'm not that great of an artist, and I try not too judge myself too harshly, but the thought of spewing out hardly recognizable crap scribbles on a constant basis filled me with dread.  So I've been practicing - trying to get better - so one day I can draw crap drawing with at least a tad more self-confidence.

Following some advice from Tom Preston, I decided to start gesture drawing, which is just a artsy-fartsy was of saying 'draw as fast as you can and don't worry about specifics too much - just get the overall flow.'  Thirty second gesture drawing seems to be all the rage, but kind of hard to do and juggle photos, sketchpads, pencils, and an alarm clock.

Then I stumbled on the Figure and Gesture Drawing Tool, a nifty website with configurable tools to run you through a course of gesture drawing - as if you had a real-life old battle-axe of a art instructor in your own living room, yelling at you to draw faster.  Okay, it doesn't yell, but it can certainly feel that way.

So, if you like to draw, and you want to get better, you might give the tool a try.  I've been at it for a week or so and I may not be getting better, but at least I am getting more confident about my crappy drawing.  One day I might even illustrate how poor Schmeky Encephalitis died in the Kobolds Ate My Baby game (for the second time,) or how my character Bloodspurt the Half-Orc Paladin in our Pathfinder game was ruthlessly executed by the party's assassin for being too annoying to live.

Until then, enjoy the hastily sketched NINJA!

- Ark

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Dawn at Olympus


The child of morning, rosy fingered Dawn, crept across the sky in flickering curtains of gold.  She illuminated the mountain fortress of Olympus, which still echoed with the revelry of the night before.

" . . . and so I threw the Acropolis at him.  The whole Acropolis.  True story," mighty Zeus slammed down his goblet of ambrosia while the gods around the table laughed and slapped their knees.  At his right hand side, gray-eyed Athena sat, her chin cradled in her hand, trying not to yawn.

"Father," Athena whispered while the laughter continued, "It wasn't the Acropolis.  It was a whole mountain.  Mt. Etna.  Remember?"

Zeus didn't even bother to look at her.  "Details are boring, girl.  It's the delivery that matters."

"Whatever, Dad," she muttered.  Being the Goddess of Wisdom meant that she was constantly surrounded by idiots.  The grey owl on her shoulder nuzzled her neck, and hooted lightly into her ear.  Athena's eyes instantly shot wide open.  "Father, father, we have a problem!" Athena hissed.

Gray bearded Zeus just talked louder over her.  The son of Cronos was recounting the time he seduced the Spartan queen Leda.

" . . . since I boinked her as a swan, she laid an egg nine months later.  You should have seen her face!"

As Zeus recounted the tale, the banquet hall became quiet, too quiet, as they were not even laughing at his jokes.  It was an uncomfortable silence, and Athena tugged at her father's robes, clearing her throat.

"What is it, girl?" he looked down at her and thundered.

She raised a finger and pointed toward the entryway.  There stood Hera, wife of almighty Zeus, arms akimbo, tapping her soft sandal on the hallowed floor.

"Well!" the queen of the gods huffed, face red.  "I thought I would find you here, cavorting with these . . ."

"Hera, my beloved wife, what brings you here at this late hour?"  Zeus sighed.

"Late?" Hera puffed, "Late?  Dawn is outside and you call this late?  Oh no, husband, it is quite early!"

Zeus blinked, and then blinked again, unsure how to reply.  "Um . . ."

Hera pulled up the hem of her robe and marched around the table, toward Zeus' throne.  The gods around the table were silent.  Dark Hades stared at the floor and shuffled his feet.  Brave Ares picked up a knife and examined his reflection in the silver.  Watery Poseidon, master of the sea, god of horses, and the 'Earth-shaker,' picked up a salt shaker and tipped a few grains into is ambrosia, then watched as tiny bubbles floated upward to the surface.

"How dare you.  I have been scouring the surface of the Earth, looking for you!" Hera jabbed a finger in Zeus' face.

"Do not talk to the King of Olympus in such a manner!" Athena shot up out of her chair.

Hera glared at Athena.  "Hold your tongue, daughter!"

"I am no daughter of yours," Athena scoffed, "I was born, fully formed, from my father's forehead."

"Oh, you were born fully formed alright, right out of his giant ass, you little shit," Hera hissed.

Before Athena could materialize the golden spear into her hands, Zeus put his palm on the crown of her head and gently, but forcefully, shoved her down into a sitting position.  "Shh, little one." He then turned to his wife.

"If you would have checked the schedule, you would have known about the party. Right boys?" Zeus said.

"Of course," Hades replied.

"Been on the calendar at least a month," Ares nodded.

"The invitations arrived last week," Poseidon waved a brightly colored piece of paper with a weak smile.

Hera's stare bore down on the gods at the table and they all found more interesting things to look at, such as the ceiling, the wall, or an imaginary noise in the direction of the kitchen.  She whipped her head back to Zeus, jabbing her finger at him again.

"You've been at it again, and this time I have a witness!"

"I . . . I . . . no," the son of Cronos stammered.

"There is no talking your way out of this one. You are guilty, guilty, guilty!" she jabbed him in the chest.

"I haven't done anything, have I, boys?" he looked back at the gods, who were still busy examining things that weren't there.

Athena stood up, "Hera, this is hardly any way to behave to your King and husband."

"Shut up!" Hera and Zeus said in unison.  Zeus eyed Hera, and then turned to Athena.  "Listen pumpkin, Mommy and Daddy are having a grown up discussion, so go find something else to do."

Athena huffed and collapsed back into her chair, crossing her arms in a powerful pout.

Hera glared at Zeus, rage in her eyes.  "You've been cavorting around with a mortal woman!"

Zeus stared at her.

"What do you have to say for yourself?"

Zeus continued to stare.

"Well?"

"I'm thinking," Zeus, the aegis-bearer, yelled at this wife.

"You swore to me, you swore on your throne, that you would stop this obsession with mortal women.  No more stalking and raping them.  No more taking the form of an animal and surprising them in the shower!" she shook her fist at him.

Zeus took a deep breath.  "Lies.  All lies.  I have been true to you.  I have not touched a mortal woman.  Who is this witness that tells such falsehoods?"

"He is there," Hera pointed to the entryway.  There stood a form, bent over, hobbling with a cane, his face scarred.  It was Hephaestus, god of fire, patron of blacksmiths.

"Oh, I see you've brought your parthenogenetic son with you," Zeus smirked.

"Tell us, my son, tell us what you saw," Hera said as the crippled god finally made it within hearing distance.

"Um, hi Athena," Hephaestus' voice cracked as he made a little wave towards the girl.

She rolled her her eyes.  "Hello Hef."

"Get on with it!" Hera hissed.

"I'll report only what I saw, the whole truth," Hephaestus started.  "Three nights ago, by a pond, I saw a flaxen haired damsel by the name of Podarge remove her clothing for an evening bath.  Of course, I did not wish to be seen, so I hid in the bushes."

Zeus laughed.  "Can you really imagine gimpy here running around the bushes like a ninja?"

"Hush," said Hera.  "Let him finish!"

"So, the flaxen haired beauty entered the water, and lo and behold, what should I see but a huge glowing bull descend from the sky, his bovine member fully erect, and he ravished the poor mortal girl from behind," Hephaestus finished.  Hera turned to Zeus, arms crossed, a smug look on her face.

"Oh come on," Zeus said, "Does every huge flying glowing bull with a tremendous cock that anyone sees on Earth have to be me?"

"Yes," the whole room said in unison.

“You are not helping!” Zeus hissed to the gods at the table.

“Mother warned me,” Hera sobbed. “She said I should marry that nice Hebrew god down the road.  But noooo . . .”

“Ambrosia lips,” his voice softened, “That was me.  I was there.  But you’ve got it all wrong.”

“How?” she sniffed.

“I was there, yes, and I was buggering Podarge.  But Podarge is a boy.”

“What?” Hera gawked at him.

“Podarge was a boy,” Zeus nodded.

“But Hephaestus said . . .”

“She had breast!” Hephaestus piped in.

“The poor boy was fat.  It was a glandular problem.  You can hardly fault him for a medical issue.”

“But . . . but . . .” Hephaestus stuttered.

“Oh come on.  Who are you going to believe, me, or a gimpy god with only one working eye!”

Hera glared at Hephaestus.

“But . . .” Hephaestus said meekly.

Hera grabbed Hephaestus by the ear and began dragging the cripple towards the door.  “You brought me out here for a boy?  A boy?  You won’t be able to even limp when I get through with you!”

The cacophony of name calling and curses gradually receded in the distance.  Sighs of relief emanated from the table.  Zeus wiped the sweat off his brow and turned to his daughter.

“Thank goodness that is done with, Athena.”

“Yes, Father,” she sighed.

“Now I want you to go to the walk-in closet in my private room.”

“Which walk-in closet?” Athena cocked her head.

“The one with the waterfall and the forest.”

“Oh.”

“There are three mortal women in there, a blonde, a brunette, and a red head.”

“Dad!” Athena bolted from her chair.

“Take the blonde.  That's Podarge.  Feed her to a Cyclops or toss her into the sky and make a constellation out of her.  Whatever you do, keep it quiet, but get rid of her.”

Athena shook her head, sighing.  “Father, if you don't control yourself, you may, one day, be replaced with a god who is a monogamist.”

“Nonsense, my girl, nonsense,” Zeus laughed, mussing her hair.  “What kind of human would worship a pansy-ass god like that?”

Rosy fingered Dawn tiptoed across the palace and back down Mount Olympus, heading across the Ionian Sea to Italy, snickering silently to herself.

The End

[with apologies to Homer . . .]

- Ark

Friday, September 16, 2011

Artistic Clarification

Clarence the Frog Goblin
There has been a continuing confusion about my artistic ability, though I have tried, in some posts, to clear it up.  The angry demon in the title banner and the sad succubus are NOT by me.  The angry demon is by Angel Urena.  The succubus is by Matthew Humphreys.  Both are absolutely wonderful artists who I commissioned with COLD, HARD CASH to draw these things.  Again, they are not by me.

I, on the other hand, draw like crap. Passable crap sometimes, but still - crap. Please take Clarence the Frog Goblin over there as an example.  If you want to commission me to do some art - sorry - I only do things for free.  But I'd be happy to draw Clarence for you.  In fact - take Clarence.  Use him.  Print him on cardstock and make an army of him to battle your players in a 4e game.  Go ahead.  Feel free.

So, sorry for any confusion.

- Ark