Monday, May 16, 2011
House Rulz
I recently bumped into a cartoonist named Ed Chase. He had been working on a comic strip based on a group of role players, and happened to have a couple in his back pocket that he let me see. (When I saw 'bumped into' and 'back pocket,' I mean that all electronically, of course.)
I liked them so much I began harassing Ed continuously about posting them somewhere that others could see them - almost to the point of him filing a lawsuit against me. I figured Blogger would be a good place to start - it's free and has people who play role playing games RIGHT THERE READY TO READ STUFF AT THE DROP OF A HAT. You know who you are.
The comic strip is called House Rulz. His name is Ed. The comic and blog are at http://houserulzcomicstrip.blogspot.com/.
Go say hi and enjoy!
- Ark
Sunday, May 15, 2011
The Wands of Doors
Last night's Labyrinth Lord game was quite fun, in part because of a D&Dified Portal gun that I included in the adventure. I flippantly mentioned such a thing in a post before the Blogopolypse of last week, but didn't really think I could pull it off. I threw caution to the wind, to great results.
For those who don't know, the Portal video games contain a gun that can place either end of a wormhole wherever the player wants (within limits.) This portal generator can be very helpful - or very deadly. A perfect compliment to an old school game, I think.
The implementation in the game is as follows. They find a box:
Inside the box are two ornately carved wands. One has a blue tint, with the word Azrak inscribed on the handle. The other is orange, with the word Burdukali carved on the surface. The wands are activated by pointing them at a properly prepared surface and uttering the control word (conveniently inscribed on the handle.)
The blue wand creates a six foot tall glowing blue oval. The wand itself glows blue when the blue oval is created. The orange wand does the same thing, but in orange. When both a blue and orange oval exists, the center of the two ovals become transparent, and both ovals become linked. When an object goes through the blue portal, they exit the orange portal, and vice-versa.
This system of linked portals continues to exist even when you change the locations of one end. The wielder of the wand can also turn off a portal by simply telling it to close.
One of the more enjoyable features of the portal is conservation of motion, also know as 'Speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.' To take full advantage of this, long drops allowing a falling body to reach terminal velocity are required. :)
In the adventure, the players found the wands at the beginning of a prison constructed from 'a soon to awaken and escape big bad.' The prison can only be navigated with the Wands of Doors.
The Boy, of course, guessed what the wands were for right off the bat.
The group hasn't gotten very far yet, but they have used the devices in ways I didn't expect them too, including isolating a gargoyle from his buddies, taunting the remaining gargoyles into a lethal trap, and using a high-velocity gargoyle corpse to destroy a large portion of a giant mushroom forest.
I'm very eager - and somewhat frightened - to see what they come up with next.
- Ark
For those who don't know, the Portal video games contain a gun that can place either end of a wormhole wherever the player wants (within limits.) This portal generator can be very helpful - or very deadly. A perfect compliment to an old school game, I think.
The implementation in the game is as follows. They find a box:
Inside the box are two ornately carved wands. One has a blue tint, with the word Azrak inscribed on the handle. The other is orange, with the word Burdukali carved on the surface. The wands are activated by pointing them at a properly prepared surface and uttering the control word (conveniently inscribed on the handle.)
The blue wand creates a six foot tall glowing blue oval. The wand itself glows blue when the blue oval is created. The orange wand does the same thing, but in orange. When both a blue and orange oval exists, the center of the two ovals become transparent, and both ovals become linked. When an object goes through the blue portal, they exit the orange portal, and vice-versa.
This system of linked portals continues to exist even when you change the locations of one end. The wielder of the wand can also turn off a portal by simply telling it to close.
One of the more enjoyable features of the portal is conservation of motion, also know as 'Speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.' To take full advantage of this, long drops allowing a falling body to reach terminal velocity are required. :)
In the adventure, the players found the wands at the beginning of a prison constructed from 'a soon to awaken and escape big bad.' The prison can only be navigated with the Wands of Doors.
The Boy, of course, guessed what the wands were for right off the bat.
The group hasn't gotten very far yet, but they have used the devices in ways I didn't expect them too, including isolating a gargoyle from his buddies, taunting the remaining gargoyles into a lethal trap, and using a high-velocity gargoyle corpse to destroy a large portion of a giant mushroom forest.
I'm very eager - and somewhat frightened - to see what they come up with next.
- Ark
Friday, May 13, 2011
While We're Waiting
While we're waiting to see if Blogger can get it's shit together, here is some found art . . .
- Ark
- Ark
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Assume the Party Escort Submission Position
I finished Portal 2 Single Player last night and am still basking in the glow of my celebratory candescence. This is an awesome sequel to the nifty first Portal game. Chell and GladOS are back - but that shouldn't be much of a spoiler - as well as lethal testing for science, the weighted companion cube, and plenty of elevators. What's more, there are new characters - including Wheatley and Cave Johnson, various gels, repulsor beams, 'discouragement' beams, a potato, and a brand new end game song.
The single player game for Portal 2 (which is the only reason I actually picked it up - to heck with multi-player,) is longer and more difficult that the original Portal. As the scenarios fling you further and further into the bowels of the earth - and back again, they get more complicated as new technologies are added to the mix. The most time a test took me to complete was about an hour. It wasn't because of the difficulty, however. It was becasue as the options grow, it's easy to miss the simple stuff - like gravity. Gravity is your friend. It also kills you - but don't forget to use it to your advantage.
Beyond the game play is the story and the characters. It was great to see GladOS again - despite the fact that she is a homicidal passive-aggressive insane AI. You get a lot more back story and insight into what makes GladOS tick. The whole thing really reminds me of the heyday of the RPG Paranoia. That West End game was great fun to play - trying to survive the machinations of the crazy AI overlord in a future distopia. Portal 2 just really puts that concept into overdrive.
I highly recommend the game, especially if you liked the first Portal. It's a great mental workout. And now, I've got all sorts of new ideas (can you say Portal Wand?) for torturing the PCs in my Labryryth Lord game. I mean, helping them test - for science.
- Ark
The single player game for Portal 2 (which is the only reason I actually picked it up - to heck with multi-player,) is longer and more difficult that the original Portal. As the scenarios fling you further and further into the bowels of the earth - and back again, they get more complicated as new technologies are added to the mix. The most time a test took me to complete was about an hour. It wasn't because of the difficulty, however. It was becasue as the options grow, it's easy to miss the simple stuff - like gravity. Gravity is your friend. It also kills you - but don't forget to use it to your advantage.
Beyond the game play is the story and the characters. It was great to see GladOS again - despite the fact that she is a homicidal passive-aggressive insane AI. You get a lot more back story and insight into what makes GladOS tick. The whole thing really reminds me of the heyday of the RPG Paranoia. That West End game was great fun to play - trying to survive the machinations of the crazy AI overlord in a future distopia. Portal 2 just really puts that concept into overdrive.
I highly recommend the game, especially if you liked the first Portal. It's a great mental workout. And now, I've got all sorts of new ideas (can you say Portal Wand?) for torturing the PCs in my Labryryth Lord game. I mean, helping them test - for science.
- Ark
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Calamity Clam Has a New Home
I know you were worried. Fretting, even. After loosing the OSR Links to Wisdom logo completion to the Temple of Smartness image, Calamity Clam had no home. Lucky for that troublesome bivalve, the Jovial Priest came snooping around image orphanage, and adopted Calamity. Now the clam, or oyster, or whatever the heck it is, is the pimp - I mean spokesperson - for a new project, the Old School Adventure Guide.
It looks like a really cool project. For the life of me, I can't think of anything to write for it, though I'd like to. I guess I just need to ruminate on the mission statement. It's a pretty broad scope, so you'd think I'd be thinking of things right and left. Maybe my brain will kick in soon. I just picked up the Dungeoneer's Survival Guide - all because of the Jovial Priest. That's like the second time I've bought the book that I've declared worthless countless times - but JP taught me otherwise. It's nifty!
I'm really happy this image I drew is finally getting used for something. I really want to see it in a hardback book somewhere. That would be cool. So get to working on the Old School Adventure Guide! You know, for Calamity's sake.
;)
- Ark
It looks like a really cool project. For the life of me, I can't think of anything to write for it, though I'd like to. I guess I just need to ruminate on the mission statement. It's a pretty broad scope, so you'd think I'd be thinking of things right and left. Maybe my brain will kick in soon. I just picked up the Dungeoneer's Survival Guide - all because of the Jovial Priest. That's like the second time I've bought the book that I've declared worthless countless times - but JP taught me otherwise. It's nifty!
I'm really happy this image I drew is finally getting used for something. I really want to see it in a hardback book somewhere. That would be cool. So get to working on the Old School Adventure Guide! You know, for Calamity's sake.
;)
- Ark
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Monday, May 9, 2011
CAPTCHA is my New Best Friend
I've been working on something - something that I told myself I would finish before I posted a blog entry. You know, to give me impetuous to finish it, since I do quite enjoy writing. But it is taking FOREVER and this carrot and stick thing is just getting tedious. So, without further ado, here is a post about CAPTCHA.
I am seriously thinking about abandoning all other forms of naming places, being it making up stuff to grabbing words from old dead languages, and replacing them with CAPTCHA words. Specifically the ones that Blogger uses. I mean, these things are awesome. I don't know what weird ass algorithm they are using. Maybe they are just chopping up the dictionary and randomly pasting it back together. I've been collecting the CAPTCHA words on each comment I make. Here are the last few:
imperith
misingst
incess
reststro
empffeci
ninsh
aritial
Are they not awesome? My mind buzzes with their potential meanings:
Imperith - It brings to mind Imperial and Impair, with a good splash of Regolith mixed in. What is it? Is it a certain type of soil that kills nobles? Or is the town founded by the rebels fighting against the empire, with massive stone walls protecting it? The town of Imperith would be situated in a mountain pass where it would be easy to throw rocks down on the red cloaked Imperial Guard and their lackeys.
Misingst - At first glance, it reminds me of Missing Misogynists. But also Mist. Mist reminds me of bogs. Perhaps this is a bog, where in ancient times, rapists were tied up, loaded down with rocks, and drowned for their crimes. But their evil overwhelmed the bog, and now the leathery skinned, undead rapist bogmen stalk the Misingst Swamp at might, searching for more victims.
Incess - More perversions coming . . . this reminds me of Inverness and Incest, all rolled into one. A ancient dark tower looms over a well hidden vale in the mountains. A sorcerer built the tower long ago, and refused to let any of the inhabitants of the vale leave. The wizard became a lich, and over the years the vale's population interbred. Now the tower is silent, tended to by the deformed and sadistic offspring of the farmers and townsfolk of Incess Vale, waiting for the time their master will rise from his crypt and wage war upon the outsiders.
Reststro - Wow - this one has Rest, Restroom, Restaurant, and Bistro all rolled into one. Everyone, I mean everyone, wants to go to the little town of Reststro. It's a little town up on the side of a mostly dormant volcano. A constant supply of hot water gives the town a constant supply of hot water - allowing for the largest collection of public and private bath houses in the region. With relaxation and money comes prostitution, gambling, graft, organized crime, corruption, and all that other fun stuff.
Empffeci - My mind goes to Imps and Imperfecto. The 'ffeci' part on the end seems Italian-esque, but it doesn't ring any bells, so we'll just make this place a sea-port on a warm inland sea. A desperate merchant struck up a deal with some Infernal Entities, selling his soul to create a he could be lord of. A host of imps descended upon the shore and began building toward the sea. The Port of Empffeci is mostly built on stilts, it's streets go this way and that, and part of the architecture is under the water. Drawn on a map, Empffeci looks like a plate of spaghetti someone threw on the sidewalk.
Ninsh - Hmm . . . Nine, Ninny, Inch. Once upon a time, there were nine sisters who were a bit stupid. Their evil step-mother told them to go to town and fetch a ham for dinner. They came back, telling her that the bridge over the nearby gorge was out. The evil step-mother told them that the gorge was just nine inches wide, so they could easily jump over it. The sisters tried, and all fell down into the gorge and drown in the river below. In celebration, the evil step-mother named place the Ninsh Gorge.
Aritial - What comes to mind? Aries. Arteries. Insubstantial. So we have a ram, blood, and see-thruness. AHA! Many years ago, a disgruntled farmer, tired of his woes and fed up with his deaf god, decided to turn to the DARK ONES to help his family and crops. He took his prized ram up to the top of a hill and, during a horrible thunderstorm, sacrificed the beast with a obsidian sickle. But instead of good fortune, his house burned down and his crops died. From then on, travelers have been wary of Aritial Hill. Some say there they see the angry ghost of the sacrificed ram, it's fleece glowing like fire and acidic blood spewing from it's horns.
Okay, maybe they won't replace all the other ways of generating names, but they are fun to brainstorm with.
- Ark
I am seriously thinking about abandoning all other forms of naming places, being it making up stuff to grabbing words from old dead languages, and replacing them with CAPTCHA words. Specifically the ones that Blogger uses. I mean, these things are awesome. I don't know what weird ass algorithm they are using. Maybe they are just chopping up the dictionary and randomly pasting it back together. I've been collecting the CAPTCHA words on each comment I make. Here are the last few:
imperith
misingst
incess
reststro
empffeci
ninsh
aritial
Are they not awesome? My mind buzzes with their potential meanings:
Imperith - It brings to mind Imperial and Impair, with a good splash of Regolith mixed in. What is it? Is it a certain type of soil that kills nobles? Or is the town founded by the rebels fighting against the empire, with massive stone walls protecting it? The town of Imperith would be situated in a mountain pass where it would be easy to throw rocks down on the red cloaked Imperial Guard and their lackeys.
Misingst - At first glance, it reminds me of Missing Misogynists. But also Mist. Mist reminds me of bogs. Perhaps this is a bog, where in ancient times, rapists were tied up, loaded down with rocks, and drowned for their crimes. But their evil overwhelmed the bog, and now the leathery skinned, undead rapist bogmen stalk the Misingst Swamp at might, searching for more victims.
Incess - More perversions coming . . . this reminds me of Inverness and Incest, all rolled into one. A ancient dark tower looms over a well hidden vale in the mountains. A sorcerer built the tower long ago, and refused to let any of the inhabitants of the vale leave. The wizard became a lich, and over the years the vale's population interbred. Now the tower is silent, tended to by the deformed and sadistic offspring of the farmers and townsfolk of Incess Vale, waiting for the time their master will rise from his crypt and wage war upon the outsiders.
Reststro - Wow - this one has Rest, Restroom, Restaurant, and Bistro all rolled into one. Everyone, I mean everyone, wants to go to the little town of Reststro. It's a little town up on the side of a mostly dormant volcano. A constant supply of hot water gives the town a constant supply of hot water - allowing for the largest collection of public and private bath houses in the region. With relaxation and money comes prostitution, gambling, graft, organized crime, corruption, and all that other fun stuff.
Empffeci - My mind goes to Imps and Imperfecto. The 'ffeci' part on the end seems Italian-esque, but it doesn't ring any bells, so we'll just make this place a sea-port on a warm inland sea. A desperate merchant struck up a deal with some Infernal Entities, selling his soul to create a he could be lord of. A host of imps descended upon the shore and began building toward the sea. The Port of Empffeci is mostly built on stilts, it's streets go this way and that, and part of the architecture is under the water. Drawn on a map, Empffeci looks like a plate of spaghetti someone threw on the sidewalk.
Ninsh - Hmm . . . Nine, Ninny, Inch. Once upon a time, there were nine sisters who were a bit stupid. Their evil step-mother told them to go to town and fetch a ham for dinner. They came back, telling her that the bridge over the nearby gorge was out. The evil step-mother told them that the gorge was just nine inches wide, so they could easily jump over it. The sisters tried, and all fell down into the gorge and drown in the river below. In celebration, the evil step-mother named place the Ninsh Gorge.
Aritial - What comes to mind? Aries. Arteries. Insubstantial. So we have a ram, blood, and see-thruness. AHA! Many years ago, a disgruntled farmer, tired of his woes and fed up with his deaf god, decided to turn to the DARK ONES to help his family and crops. He took his prized ram up to the top of a hill and, during a horrible thunderstorm, sacrificed the beast with a obsidian sickle. But instead of good fortune, his house burned down and his crops died. From then on, travelers have been wary of Aritial Hill. Some say there they see the angry ghost of the sacrificed ram, it's fleece glowing like fire and acidic blood spewing from it's horns.
Okay, maybe they won't replace all the other ways of generating names, but they are fun to brainstorm with.
- Ark
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